Free Fall
by ShellSueD
Summary: My one-shot version of how the bridge rescue scene from Takedown Twenty should have played out. Told from Ranger's point of view. (definite spoilers if you haven't read it)


_**AN: This scene has been done by other fanfic authors, ones with way more talent than I possess (LilyGhost), but I wrote it anyway and in the way I thought it should go. I did borrow some of JE's dialogue – no infringement intended. **_

_My beta is on leave so many apologies for any errors. I will fix them when she returns. _

* * *

I had a leg over the railing even though I knew it was too late. I told her to stay still but her body was swinging and the knot wasn't going to hold.

She had a second - maybe two - before it broke loose and she plummeted into the river.

I reached for the rope and then she was in free fall. For a millisecond my breath stopped, my heart stopped…_time_ stopped. I heard Tank's voice of protest behind me but I dove in after her.

_Curl into a ball, Steph._ I willed her to hear my unspoken plea and as if she had, she pulled her legs up tightly to her chest.

I could hear the splash of her hitting the water even over the wind rushing in my ears. I pulled up my own legs and crashed into the murky depths of the Delaware.

I reached out as soon as I uncurled my body and she was right there. I pushed her to the surface and we both sucked in a breath before she sank back under. I pushed her up again and wrapped an arm around her, holding her tightly to me.

"Relax!" I shouted over the roar of the churning water. "I'm going to float with the current and tow you in." She was shaking and her teeth were chattering but I felt the tension ease from her limbs enough for me to lay us back and let the current take us down stream. As we got closer to the bank of the river, I was able to scissors kick us to the shore where Tank, Hal, Manny and Ram were waiting.

Tank hauled her out and wrapped her in a blanket while Ram removed the cuffs. Hal held out a hand for me but I was already up and Tank turned Stephanie right into my arms. I held her against my chest, my cheek pressed firmly to hers.

"You're okay," I said. "You're safe." She nodded and I squeezed my arms tighter around her. _That was too close, Babe. Too damn close._

She tilted her head up as if she'd heard me again and I took a step back, keeping my hands on her shoulders. "Are you hurt? Anything broken?"

She shook her head and stuttered out a no. I looked around and spotted the cop car and an EMS truck. "Do you want the EMS tech to check you out?"

"N-n-n-no."

I pushed the hair plastered to her cheek behind her ear. "I need to take care of things here. I'll have Tank drive you home and you can talk to the police after you've had a shower and gotten into dry clothes."

"It was M-m-moe and Shorty," she said. "Damn, I can't stop shaking."

"Adrenaline burn off. It's normal."

"Why aren't y-y-you shaking?"

"I'm not normal." That got a smile out of her and I pulled her into one more hug before handing her off to Tank.

I gave names and descriptions of the kidnappers to the police officer on scene and suggested an idea of where they should start looking. I would be conducting my own investigation but the more bodies out searching for the assholes the better. I made a promise to have her at the station by the end of the day to give her statement and then had Manny drop me at my car.

I slid behind the wheel and was surprised to find my hand shaking when I reached for the button to turn on the engine. I wasn't cold and I'd learned to control the adrenaline crash years ago so that left only one reason for the tremble.

The thought of losing Stephanie terrified me to the very core of my damaged soul.

I dropped my head onto the steering wheel and took a couple of deep breaths while my mind went over to the dark side. What if I hadn't gotten there in time? What if she'd drowned in that river? What if she'd died never knowing how much she means to me? I pushed my sopping hair off my forehead and tried to force the image of her panicked face from my brain. She was safe and on her way home and playing the '_what if' _game wasn't good for anyone, especially me. It was just a harsh reminder that I wouldn't be able to handle it if anything happened to her.

I took one last calming breath and straightened my spine. I grabbed my phone off the passenger seat and dialed a number I unfortunately knew by heart.

Joe Morelli was literally the last person on earth I wanted to speak with and although I knew he would have already received a dozen phone calls, I needed to make sure he was read in on the situation and was on his way to her.

It took him four rings to answer and it was with a curt, "Yeah?"

"Did you hear?"

Too many beats went by without an answer and it had me curling the hand resting on my thigh into a fist. "I heard," he finally replied and then nothing but dead air.

No one would ever say Morelli and I are friends, least of all me, and our mutual feelings for Stephanie would never allow us to venture into that territory but over the years we had maintained a tentatively amicable working relationship - until Hawaii. We'd beaten the shit out of each other - a fight that was probably long overdue - and when we'd woken up later, handcuffed and in the hospital, he didn't like the answer I gave him after he asked point blank if I was in love with her.

Since then we've done nothing but keep our distance. Only threats or _potential _threats to Stephanie's well-being could bring us within ten feet of one another. Despite the issues we had - and there were _many _- I knew he would do everything within his power to keep her safe. It was the one and only thing we had in common.

"I had Tank take her home," I said to fill the silence of all the things unsaid and undone between us. Still no response so I added, "She's going to need you."

He let out a short, very audible breath. What the fuck did that mean? Was he frustrated? Exasperated? Angry? I actually didn't give a shit; I just wanted to know he was going to go to her.

"Yeah, okay," he muttered and after a beat, "Thanks." The dial tone sounded in my ear and I dropped the phone back onto the seat beside me.

I managed to start the car and ease into traffic, intending to head right to my apartment and then directly into a shower but five minutes later I was turning onto Hamilton and then onto Stephanie's street. I pulled into her parking lot and searched for Joe's truck but it was nowhere to be found. He should've been here by now. _Fucking asshole._

I parked in an empty space and cut the engine. I'd give him five minutes and then I was going up. He would just have to deal with my presence when or _if_ he arrived. I watched the time click by on the digital clock on my dash and exactly five minutes later I was out of the car, stopping only to retrieve my emergency bag from the trunk.

I hefted the duffle over my shoulder and took the stairs two at a time. I knocked repeatedly without a response and then let myself in. The shower was going so I dropped my bag in the entryway and headed down the hall. Stopping at the bathroom door I pressed my ear to the wood and could faintly hear her crying over the running water. _Shit. _I knew it. That's why I wanted to make sure Morelli was on his way. I tried the door but found it secured - luckily there wasn't a lock made I couldn't breach.

A second later I swung it open and quickly stripped out of my clothes. She wasn't even surprised when I stepped into the tub behind her. She simply turned and wrapped her arms around my neck and cried while I held her against my body.

When her sobs began to subside, I scrubbed us both clean, removing the stench of the river water and then wrapped her in a towel before tying one around my own waist. I pulled a third one off the shelf above her toilet and gently ran it over her hair, just enough to stop it from dripping.

"Go get dressed," I instructed softly as I hung the towel over her shower rod.

"What about you?" She asked with a voice just above a whisper.

"I grabbed my bug-out bag, it's by the door." I guided her out into the hall with my hand at the small of her back. "Go. I'll be there in a minute."

She shuffled off to her room and I went to get my bag. I glanced at the clock hanging on the wall above the kitchen sink as I went by. Thirty minutes since my call and no Morelli. I wondered, and not for the first time, why she was so determined to make their relationship work this time.

I pulled out a pair of cargo pants and a t-shirt and got dressed in her living room. When I was done, her good for nothing boyfriend still had not arrived so I headed straight to her bedroom. She'd donned the same white t-shirt and striped pajama bottoms she'd been wearing a few nights before and despite the circumstances, it had me drawing in a quick breath and biting the inside of my cheek to counteract the sudden punch of lust with a little pain.

I leaned in the doorway and watched her pull back the covers and slide between the sheets of her bed. She settled her head onto the pillows and yanked her comforter all the way up to her chin before turning to look at me. Her normally bright blue eyes were dull and wide and rimmed with red. Her skin was unusually pale and my heart lurched beneath my shirt. I hated seeing her that way.

"You okay?"

She gave me a single head nod. "Yes, thanks to you. I'm just tired. Turns out getting dropped into the Delaware is exhausting."

_"Babe."_

As I'd hoped, that made her grin, but only for a second. "Will you...will you stay with me for a while?"

I wanted tell her there wasn't a damn thing that could make me leave, not even a hotheaded Italian cop, but I just crossed the room and settled onto the bed beside her. She turned to me, curling into my side and I wrapped my arm around her back.

"I'm here, Steph." _I'll always be here, Babe._

She sighed softly and was instantly asleep.

I held her while she slept and tried to come up with a plan that would get her to agree to stay with me until this whole mess was sorted out but I had the feeling that would be a futile effort at best. Stephanie could be fiercely independent and unbelievably stubborn and it was part of the excuse I used for convincing myself we shouldn't be together. I was just as stubborn and independent as she was and together we were always on the verge of a destructive power struggle.

But at this moment I didn't care. I didn't care about our differences or our many similarities. I didn't care about her past or mine. I didn't care that she came from a long line of crazy women and that she had an unusual ability for stumbling into the worst kind of shit. I didn't care that she probably loved Morelli and would kick me to the curb the second he arrived. And if I _did_ let her know how I actually felt about her, I didn't even care if she told me to go straight to hell - which I would rightly deserve - I just wanted to stay here, with her in my arms, and never, ever leave.

I let out a slow breath and pressed my lips to the crown of her head before letting my eyes close and trying to rest. The image of her falling wouldn't stay out of my head so I gave up on sleep and pulled her tighter to my side. A couple hours later, just when I'd come to the decision it was time to man up and tell her I loved her, and if she'd let me, I would gladly spend the rest of my life showing her just how much when a noise had me holding my breath and listening intently. Everything was silent except for the soft exhalation of Stephanie's breath as she continued to sleep next to me.

I slowly eased my body away from her, being careful not to jostle her awake. I looked around the room for my gun but I'd left it with Tank before I jumped into the river and hadn't remembered to retrieve it. I had a backup, but it was in my bag out in the living room.

I looked down at my feet that were sans shoes and almost rolled my eyes. Some protector I was. No gun, no knife, and no fucking shoes. I moved silently across the room to the door, hoping it wouldn't squeak. I breathed a sigh of relief when it opened without a sound, just far enough for me to slip through. I made my way down the hall and discovered the rest of the place empty. I put on the dry boots from my bag and removed the gun. I didn't have to check if it was loaded; my guns were always ready to go.

I knew I'd heard a noise and since we were alone in the apartment it had to have come from outside. If Moe and Shorty had come to finish the job they'd botched earlier, they were going to have an intimate conversation with my Glock instead.

I carefully opened the front door and gun first, stepped into the hall. I scanned right and then left and let out a sigh at the man leaning up against the wall just outside the door. I tucked my Glock into the small of my back and crossed my arms over my chest.

"I was expecting you a while ago."

Detective Morelli ran a hand through his messy black hair and then shoved both of them deep into the pockets of his jeans. He held my gaze and it looked like he was contemplating whether he wanted to shoot me or punch me. I was ready for either scenario, but he only sighed and asked, "Is she okay?"

I lifted a shoulder. "As well as can be expected, I guess. She could have really used the support of her boyfriend a couple of hours ago."

Fire flashed briefly in his whiskey colored eyes. "I'm sure you had no problem filling that position."

I dropped my arms and slightly widened my stance. "I gave her what she needed – what you were apparently unwilling to provide."

He cut his eyes away with a soft snort of derision. "Yeah. I'll just _bet_ you did."

"I'm not even going to dignify that with a response, Morelli. You'll believe whatever you want to believe no matter what I say anyway. Since you've finally decided to make an appearance, I'll leave her in your care because if we continue this conversation, it will end with my fist in your face and Stephanie doesn't need any more drama in her life today."

I turned away but his words stopped me in my tracks. "You really jumped in after her, didn't you?"

I spun back around. "Of course I did."

"Yeah," he nodded and then tipped his head back against the wall. "I don't think I could have done it."

I narrowed my eyes, not sure where this was going. "Are you telling me you wouldn't have tried to save the woman you supposedly love?"

He brought a hand up and rubbed at his temples as if trying to stave off a headache and then shoved it back into his pocket. "I don't know what the fuck I'm saying. I've been driving around for two hours thinking about it, trying to picture myself in your place and every time I'm there and I look over the edge...I can't do it." He swallowed hard and fixed his gaze on a spot down the hallway. "They told me you went in right away, not even a single second of hesitation; you just dove in with no regard for your own safety and saved her life." He shook his head and brought his eyes back to mine. They were wet with unchecked emotion. "I don't think I could have done it. I would've stayed on that bridge and she probably would have drowned."

I didn't believe that. I knew he loved her and would be just as devastated as I would if anything happened to her. He would've done the same thing. "Joe…" I started but he cut me off.

"Don't. I know what you're going to say, and maybe you're right. Maybe I would have done the same thing, but…" He speared his fingers through his hair again before a barely whispered _"Jesus"_ fell from his mouth on plea or a prayer – I couldn't be sure. "Look, I caught an undercover case and will be off the radar for a while. Probably a _long_ while. Will you…just tell her I'm glad she's okay." He pushed off the wall and headed for the stairs.

What the _fuck? _That was it? I'd apparently overestimated how much he cared about her if he was willing to walk away now, just like that. "Morelli." I called to his retreating form and for a second thought he would ignore me but he turned back. "What are you doing? What is this?"

He inhaled deeply and let it out slowly. "You should tell her, Ranger. Tell her what you told me in Hawaii before it's too late. What if you'd gotten there even two minutes later today? What if she'd died in that river never knowing how you truly feel about her? Wouldn't that be the worst kind of torture, having to live the rest of your life knowing how many chances you didn't take? The truth is, you could have had her a long time ago and never had the balls to follow through. For someone whose are supposed to be made of steel, it's pretty chickenshit." A small, sad little smile touched the corners of his lips. "Be good to her," he added and then he was gone.

I stood there in the hallway for a several beats wondering how it was I'd just been schooled by Joseph f_ucking_ Morelli.

Even though he was on point and I'd already come to the same conclusion myself, I never wanted to admit he knew that much about me. Apparently our mutual love for the same woman made me unusually transparent.

I reentered Steph's apartment and left my gun on the kitchen counter on my way back to the bedroom. I was going to take Joe's advice, now, before I lost another chance. I had no delusions about how she would take it. I'd be surprised if she didn't toss me out on my ass after all the stupid and thoughtless things I've said to her in the past to keep her at arm's length. There's absolutely no reason for her to believe a word I say but I'm going to do all I can to convince her.

I pushed open the door and found her on her back with a pillow covering her face. I sank onto the mattress and lifted it off.

She blinked open her eyes. "I thought you left."

"I did, but only for a minute and I didn't go far. How are you feeling?"

"I'm doing great," she said with a little half grin. "I guess I just needed to cry and then sleep. I feel a lot better."

I could tell. Her skin was back to a healthy pink and the dark shadows were no longer hiding behind her eyes. "I wish I could say the same. I'm having a hard time erasing the vision of you falling from the bridge."

"Yes, but you jumped in and saved me. You're my hero."

"Being your hero is a full-time job. I worry that someday I'm not going to get to you in time."

Her eyes narrowed. "I didn't know you worried about _anythin_g."

The wet mop of her hair had dried into a riotous mass around her face and I gently brushed it back. "I worry about _you._" I left my hand on her cheek and traced my thumb over the delicate skin below her eye. "My heart stopped when you went into that water today, Steph. I didn't know if I'd be able to save you and it nearly paralyzed me."

She covered her hand with mine and leaned into my touch. "Are _you _okay? I don't think I've seen this look on your face before." Of course she hadn't. I'd carefully and deliberately kept all emotion from my expression whenever she was around, but not any longer. I needed her to see now and could only hope she would believe.

I leaned over and pressed my lips to hers in a quick but not meaningless kiss. "Do you know why I went in after you?"

She let go of my hand and lowered hers to the bed, eyeing me skeptically as if it was a trick question. I moved my hand from her cheek and settled it onto the pillow beside her head, keeping my torso braced over hers so she couldn't look away.

Finally deciding I wasn't messing around, she said, "Because you care about me and didn't want me to drown."

"Yes," I agreed. "But it's more than that. I did it because the thought of you not being around literally brings me to my knees. I saw you falling and I quit breathing and knew if I didn't get you out, I would never want to breathe again. I couldn't handle it if you were gone; I wouldn't be able to take it, so _not_ going in after you wasn't even an option."

She closed her eyes and I watched her chest rise and fall before she opened them. They were shiny with unshed tears and she fought to keep them from falling. "What…what are you trying to say, Ranger?"

What the fuck was I trying to say? Obviously I wasn't doing it well. I've always been a man of few words, letting my actions speak for me so I was treading into uncharted territory. Maybe a more direct approach would be best. I took a deep breath and jumped. My stomach dropped just as it had when we were both in a free fall off the bridge.

"I'm saying that I'm in love with you, Stephanie. I've been in love with you for a very long time and although I've known this, I haven't been ready or _willing_ to act on it. Until now. I thought I was going to lose you and it made me acknowledge how short life is and how much I want you to be a part of mine, for however much time we have left on this earth."

"I thought I _was _a part of your life."

"You are, Babe," I said with a small smile and brushed my lips over hers again. "But I only let you into the parts that were safe, where neither one of us would get hurt, at least that's what I tried to do, but today I realized you're in all the way, Steph. You're in every deep and dark corner of my life and I don't ever want you to leave. I want you. All of you. In my life, in my bed, in my _heart_, for as long as possible."

She looked perplexed and that wasn't a surprise since everything I've ever said to her in the past completely contradicted all I'd just articulated.

"You…you want to be with me? In a relationship? A real live, no strings attached, no qualifiers relationship?"

"Yes, that's what I'm saying."

She arched a brow. "That completely contradicts everything you've ever said to me – just _two_ nights ago you told me you weren't willing to pay the price – which come to think of it goes against the "no price" comment you've made on more than one occasion. So what am I supposed to believe?"

Exactly. I'm lucky she even still speaks to me. "I wish that I could take it all back, Steph. Every thoughtless comment, every bullshit excuse, but I can't. All I can do is admit to you I was wrong and say that I'm sorry and stand here in the light of my mistakes and openly ask you to forgive them, to forgive _me_."

Her eyes widened and her mouth dropped open in shock. She probably didn't know I was capable of apologizing for anything. _"Wow,"_ she finally breathed. "And me getting dropped in the river made you have this…_revelation?_"

"It was certainly the catalyst, yeah."

"Damn," she said. "If I'd know that was all it would take I would have hurled myself off that bridge _years_ ago."

I grinned down at her. "I've wasted a lot of time. I'm sorry."

"Yeah," she agreed with her own smile and the bit the corner of her lip, the grin turning into a frown. "I won't lie and tell you I haven't wanted you to say those things to me for a very long time, but I've never let myself hope there could ever be anything between us but friendship, so this is a lot to digest. I…I'm gonna need some time. Is that okay?"

I wanted to say no and demand that she pack up her apartment and move in with me immediately so we could start our life together but I'm not an idiot, well not _that_ big of an idiot. I knew she'd need time to adjust and she'd want to have a conversation with Morelli before she made any kind of decision. I wouldn't tell her about the talk he and I had – that was between us.

"Of course it is. I'm going to go take care of a few things and get an update on the hunt for your kidnappers. The police want you to go in and give your statement – can I come by later and take you to the station?"

"I'd like that," she said with a small smile.

I leaned over her, placing a soft kiss on her forehead, and left her with a gentle reminder. "I meant every word, Steph."

I grabbed my wet clothes from the bathroom and stuffed them into my bag before heading out. I had the door open and a foot over the threshold when her voice brought me back inside.

"I don't need time, Ranger."

I turned and found her standing a foot away, her hair a wild mess around her shoulders and tears shining in her eyes. She'd never looked more beautiful.

"I love you," she whispered and I dropped my bag and pulled her into my arms so I could kiss her like I'd been dying to since I dragged her out of the river. When I finally and _reluctantly_ separated our tongues and lips, I said, "Come stay with me, Babe. At least until we get this mess sorted out."

"Okay," she agreed with a nod. "But…I need to talk to Joe first."

"I know." I would expect nothing less from her. I tucked her hair behind her ear and pressed my lips to her temple. "Call me when you're ready."

"I will," she promised and I left feeling hopeful. And happy. Happier than I ever thought possible.


End file.
